So it really has been an Amazing time
the past couple days...
Right now I am here with Sinn in our Orlando Hotel room, apparently the bathrooms here are not good enough for me, so tonight the elevator had to do.
But that being said this is what happens when the booze hits my brain, I mean it has got to come out somewhere.
Another heavy week of Travel, but it is always worth it.
So Thurs I left Fort Worth for a long trip starting with the Indianapolis Lair.
And actually I would like to say the Top Lair in Orlando is one of the most Impressive Lairs I have been to run by the great Zuzu, but Indianapolis was beyond my expectations.
The guys there are really committed and diverse, I have really seen nothing like those guys in Indi. Props to Hypnotize, and props to Bishop for the hospitality.
But tonight we are sitting here in Orlando tired as fuck!
Sinn keeps telling me that I have got to put on the breaks.
I have really got to get to Trinidad and just chill and lay down on the green grass falling asleep to the sound of West Indies accents forgetting about the world around me.
One of the things that I talk about with every one is is that your life style should be what ultimately shapes your game. And not even your game but your life (hence the word lifestyle).
And one of the things I bring up to guys is also that when I started in this my life was music and the arts. And now those parts of me have been neglected for the past few months.
Those are the things that one can never forget about themselves,
You can always walk the road laid out in front of you, but you can never stop walking the road that is inside you.
But enough of that hippy shit...
Soon enough I will be sinking my cock into some sweet warm pussy and I will be back to my old self.
There is nothing like fucking to set your mind straight, you have got to let the poisons out!
And as for tonight, there is one thing for certain, Sinn and I are a good team.
Always have been, always will!
Saturday, March 22, 2008
Thursday, March 20, 2008
El Topo on Pick Up Podcast!
Hey Guys,
So AJ and Jordan interviewed me
last week and here it is!
El Topo PPC
Listen and love it... or hate it!
As Dante told me, I sound like a guy who thinks about this stuff way too much.
I figure that is a good things, but who likes their own voice.
Also get on my private email list and you can get access to my other Podcasts with Captain Jack, Boom, Priest and the California Pimp!
CJ and I just recorded a badass one on Frames 2 days ago.
Not up yet, but he breaks down EVERYTHING! Nearly 2 hours long!!!!!
But take a listen and let me know what you think!
Word
ET
So AJ and Jordan interviewed me
last week and here it is!
El Topo PPC
Listen and love it... or hate it!
As Dante told me, I sound like a guy who thinks about this stuff way too much.
I figure that is a good things, but who likes their own voice.
Also get on my private email list and you can get access to my other Podcasts with Captain Jack, Boom, Priest and the California Pimp!
CJ and I just recorded a badass one on Frames 2 days ago.
Not up yet, but he breaks down EVERYTHING! Nearly 2 hours long!!!!!
But take a listen and let me know what you think!
Word
ET
Richard Feynman and Henry Miller
So I am on a chat with Munich Hawk
and it has inspired me to post this...
Sometimes I wonder way people in the community are so into Self Help.
The idea of it is great of taking control of your life, but for the most part is seems to be a circular product.
I have read my fair share, and maybe that is just me.
But one thing I have never understood is that why don't people read
Henry Miller or Richard Feynman.
In fact most people in the community don't know who either one is.
Miller was the ultimate Bohemian, he actually would have to Rival William Blake for that title.
But if you were to read Tropic of Cancer or his Love Letters you would know how and why I say to read his books.
He was more badass than any PUA I know and in his 80s he was still pulling 10s.
Then there is Feynman who is a character himself.
Won a Noble Prize for Physics, theorized in Strip Clubs, and even broke down game himself.
He was at Los Alamos and was instrumental in Challenger Investigation.
He wrote in "Surly you must be Joking Mr. Feynman" how he learned to pick up chicks in bar all the way across the USA. But mainly he would get stuck in Vegas and hustle all sorts of shit.
Anyway I felt propelled to put that out there...
PUT DOWN THE TONY ROBBINS AND PICK UP THE HENRY MILLER!!!!
and it has inspired me to post this...
Sometimes I wonder way people in the community are so into Self Help.
The idea of it is great of taking control of your life, but for the most part is seems to be a circular product.
I have read my fair share, and maybe that is just me.
But one thing I have never understood is that why don't people read
Henry Miller or Richard Feynman.
In fact most people in the community don't know who either one is.
Miller was the ultimate Bohemian, he actually would have to Rival William Blake for that title.
But if you were to read Tropic of Cancer or his Love Letters you would know how and why I say to read his books.
He was more badass than any PUA I know and in his 80s he was still pulling 10s.
Then there is Feynman who is a character himself.
Won a Noble Prize for Physics, theorized in Strip Clubs, and even broke down game himself.
He was at Los Alamos and was instrumental in Challenger Investigation.
He wrote in "Surly you must be Joking Mr. Feynman" how he learned to pick up chicks in bar all the way across the USA. But mainly he would get stuck in Vegas and hustle all sorts of shit.
Anyway I felt propelled to put that out there...
PUT DOWN THE TONY ROBBINS AND PICK UP THE HENRY MILLER!!!!
Tuesday, March 18, 2008
Podcast With Captain Jack is UP!
Ahhh,
So go to eltopopua.com
and Sign Up!
And you can hear us fuck up about 10 times before we get going.
But once we stop fucking up, it is golden so listen in on it.
Also you need to stay on board, because he is doing a more thorough one on frames in the next few weeks.
But here it is guys!
Shaft and Fidelio are there in the background making fun of us, come join the fun!
Word
ET
Heading to Florida
So guys I have been busy with a whole bunch of stuff
but here is what I will be up to for the next few weeks...
On March 20th I will be speaking in Indiana at the Lair up there!
And then on
On March 21st I will be in Florida with Sinn at the TopLair doing a talk on Body Language and
Sinn will be doing a talk on Inner Game and his Journey through all of this.
It is one of the best talks I have seen, and I am not sure why he limits it to Inner Game alone, but that is what he calls it.
A lot of people ask me about body language and in Boston I actually did an entire talk on it in Dec. It is actually one of my biggest things I harp on when working with someone.
To sign up for the talk
head this way and you can take care of all the arrangements.
Also I will be doing a Seminar on Building theREDstack and Sinn will be holding workshops as well.
I invite everybody to come out and join us, it should be a blast.
I actually have a lot of friends out there in Florida, all over the state.
I will be traveling all around there when I am in Orlando.
I am going to try and hit a bunch of my buddies in Gainesville, Tampa and Pensacola while up there.
It is too bad Fidelio won't be there to make fun of my Vegan friends in Florida as well.
Then I will be back in Trinidad!
WHOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAHHHAHAHHAHAHAH!!!!!
The Neighborhood Slut
This is some interesting stuff here...
Doc Holiday turned me on to this girl's blog.
Pretty, pretty, pretty, pretty....good
Apparently she may be doing a podcast with her too.
Check out her blog.
A side from that I am almost off to Indiana to visit Bishop's Lair,
and then after that Orlando with Sinn.
Should be fun, hopefully will have some stories.
Plus I will be in Trinidad again for the following week, maybe Grenada as well to visit a PUA friend.
ET
Friday, March 14, 2008
The Ebb and Flow of being a PUA
So I know I have been away for a while ,
Not really an excuse for it other than working all the time.
I thought a week off would do me some good, but it just left me backed up!
So for the past week I got to say has been a great one.
Mainly because of yesterday.
One of the things about the Dallas scene is that some of my best friends come out of the community.
There is Sinn, CJ, Shaft, Fidelio...
So last night a bunch of us met up as we always do.
In fact there is a Podcast going up in the next day or so of CJ and myself...there were a lot of outtakes, I am wondering if I should just put em all up and say 'fuck it' or cut em out.
Also CJ is doing another one with me breaking down frames later in the week.
And there is a Podcast of myself and The California Pimp and Pimp Z coming up too.
To hear them sign up at eltopopua.com
Shaft, Fidelio and I meet quite a bit, but it is rare when we all meet together.
This time it was a bit different, because Sinn was out of town, but Boom came up form Austin.
The thing is that every time we all get together we can really bounce stuff off each other in a unique way.
For instance, Fidelio is one of the wisest and funniest guys out there.
He and I talk a lot, pretty much every idea I have with game I can bounce off him. There are very few people, especially in the community that have the life experience and the wisdom that he offers. The other thing too is that you won't stop laughing. It actually gets kind of hard to communicate, when he is knocking all my Vegan and Homeless friends in funky town.
Shaft you my know about subpersonalities, but his real gem of a trait is to be able to communicate in such a diplomatic way.
Nothing is ever confusing with Shaft, he can make sense out of you needing to eat your own toe nail fungus in order to have the worms grow in your intestines, because they are actually better pets than dogs. Now Shaft is not as demented as me, but if i had his skills, that is what I would do with them.
Captain Jack, although he writes a shitload and has influenced my game and life in so many ways actually rarely sheds light on his new ideas.
So this time he shed a lot of light opn some of his new ideas.
First off one of the things we started talking about was all of our theoretical ideas.
But the one thing that keep coming up was that there is a huge need for any PUA to get good you need to be able to game and be your own PUA leader.
You need to be the one to carry the torch.
The things is that there is no place like Dallas right now where there is such an evolution of game. And what we all talked about, in what makes us different than other guys we know is this...
1. We were able to Throw Ourselves into the Fire. When we first learned this stuff, all of us went completely committed to it. We never sat back to argue about theory we (did that later), we all went for it. We also fucked up a lot, but we went for it!
2. We were all self critical. I can remember a time when I started teaching that Sinn told me usually when a new coach working under him thinks he is better than he is he actually won't succeed in the upper levels of game. But when he actually thinks he has room to grow he will actually get better and better.
The thing with this is all of us know what we are good at and know what we are bad at. And we all realize that there is so much more to learn in all of this that we are always trying to push it further. And the funny thing is, that now things are completely different from how we learned them. It doesn't matter how good you get at something, you shoudl always have a long way to go, growth-wise... ALWAYS
3. Being curious. This is probably one of the most important things to have. You need to always know there is way more to be learned. We all actually love this part of it.
We all love to think of new things and also implement them. We love it so much that we actually don't have a problem with fucking up our game in order to figure a new thing out.
In fact one thing I have always seen with all of us, is that we fuck up a lot when we are experimenting. I mean we will go through huge slumps in order to get something down.
The best example of this is CJ.
He will try and figure out a new approach and a new angle and will hit speed bumps for a month or so. I will start getting in my head, how he is slacking... and then out of nowhere he will smoke us all.
I mean when he starts to click at whatever he has been working on, there is literally nothing like it. No one can really compete.
4. One thing at a time. All of us love to do so many things and get good at all of them, but the best way to not accomplish any of the many things we love, it try and doing them all at once. So when you are gaming and looking at stuff to improve, as I am always trying to do, pick one thing to get down. Don't try and get it all down at once. Remember it is lifestyle not, a masquerade of stereotypes you're trying to perfect. Pick one thing, and get it down, before you move onto the next.
5. We all know when to live life and when to game.
Lifestyle is what makes all this work. this is the goal. We may be know as PUAs online, but we are humans in the real world.
We know when to push and when to pull.
That is part of the reason why we changed game so much.
Sadly most predominant theories on game revolve around changing your image, building up a false one to be attractive. We pull it off in being ourselves. Now we are not trying to be naturals, we are very structured, but we do it to be ourselves in the best sort of way.
Our main tool isn't being in State, it is about using what we learned way back when and are figuring out to pull this off.
Guys...
Attraction isn't a series of steps that start and stop in an interaction, Attraction is an attitude that gains momentum in a strategic that opens the door for seduction.
Stay tuned a bunch of Audio goes up this week!
Get on the list to hear it!
www.eltopopua.com
Not really an excuse for it other than working all the time.
I thought a week off would do me some good, but it just left me backed up!
So for the past week I got to say has been a great one.
Mainly because of yesterday.
One of the things about the Dallas scene is that some of my best friends come out of the community.
There is Sinn, CJ, Shaft, Fidelio...
So last night a bunch of us met up as we always do.
In fact there is a Podcast going up in the next day or so of CJ and myself...there were a lot of outtakes, I am wondering if I should just put em all up and say 'fuck it' or cut em out.
Also CJ is doing another one with me breaking down frames later in the week.
And there is a Podcast of myself and The California Pimp and Pimp Z coming up too.
To hear them sign up at eltopopua.com
Shaft, Fidelio and I meet quite a bit, but it is rare when we all meet together.
This time it was a bit different, because Sinn was out of town, but Boom came up form Austin.
The thing is that every time we all get together we can really bounce stuff off each other in a unique way.
For instance, Fidelio is one of the wisest and funniest guys out there.
He and I talk a lot, pretty much every idea I have with game I can bounce off him. There are very few people, especially in the community that have the life experience and the wisdom that he offers. The other thing too is that you won't stop laughing. It actually gets kind of hard to communicate, when he is knocking all my Vegan and Homeless friends in funky town.
Shaft you my know about subpersonalities, but his real gem of a trait is to be able to communicate in such a diplomatic way.
Nothing is ever confusing with Shaft, he can make sense out of you needing to eat your own toe nail fungus in order to have the worms grow in your intestines, because they are actually better pets than dogs. Now Shaft is not as demented as me, but if i had his skills, that is what I would do with them.
Captain Jack, although he writes a shitload and has influenced my game and life in so many ways actually rarely sheds light on his new ideas.
So this time he shed a lot of light opn some of his new ideas.
First off one of the things we started talking about was all of our theoretical ideas.
But the one thing that keep coming up was that there is a huge need for any PUA to get good you need to be able to game and be your own PUA leader.
You need to be the one to carry the torch.
The things is that there is no place like Dallas right now where there is such an evolution of game. And what we all talked about, in what makes us different than other guys we know is this...
1. We were able to Throw Ourselves into the Fire. When we first learned this stuff, all of us went completely committed to it. We never sat back to argue about theory we (did that later), we all went for it. We also fucked up a lot, but we went for it!
2. We were all self critical. I can remember a time when I started teaching that Sinn told me usually when a new coach working under him thinks he is better than he is he actually won't succeed in the upper levels of game. But when he actually thinks he has room to grow he will actually get better and better.
The thing with this is all of us know what we are good at and know what we are bad at. And we all realize that there is so much more to learn in all of this that we are always trying to push it further. And the funny thing is, that now things are completely different from how we learned them. It doesn't matter how good you get at something, you shoudl always have a long way to go, growth-wise... ALWAYS
3. Being curious. This is probably one of the most important things to have. You need to always know there is way more to be learned. We all actually love this part of it.
We all love to think of new things and also implement them. We love it so much that we actually don't have a problem with fucking up our game in order to figure a new thing out.
In fact one thing I have always seen with all of us, is that we fuck up a lot when we are experimenting. I mean we will go through huge slumps in order to get something down.
The best example of this is CJ.
He will try and figure out a new approach and a new angle and will hit speed bumps for a month or so. I will start getting in my head, how he is slacking... and then out of nowhere he will smoke us all.
I mean when he starts to click at whatever he has been working on, there is literally nothing like it. No one can really compete.
4. One thing at a time. All of us love to do so many things and get good at all of them, but the best way to not accomplish any of the many things we love, it try and doing them all at once. So when you are gaming and looking at stuff to improve, as I am always trying to do, pick one thing to get down. Don't try and get it all down at once. Remember it is lifestyle not, a masquerade of stereotypes you're trying to perfect. Pick one thing, and get it down, before you move onto the next.
5. We all know when to live life and when to game.
Lifestyle is what makes all this work. this is the goal. We may be know as PUAs online, but we are humans in the real world.
We know when to push and when to pull.
That is part of the reason why we changed game so much.
Sadly most predominant theories on game revolve around changing your image, building up a false one to be attractive. We pull it off in being ourselves. Now we are not trying to be naturals, we are very structured, but we do it to be ourselves in the best sort of way.
Our main tool isn't being in State, it is about using what we learned way back when and are figuring out to pull this off.
Guys...
Attraction isn't a series of steps that start and stop in an interaction, Attraction is an attitude that gains momentum in a strategic that opens the door for seduction.
Stay tuned a bunch of Audio goes up this week!
Get on the list to hear it!
www.eltopopua.com
Saturday, March 1, 2008
Shaft and Subpersonalities!
Hey guys,
So there is this guy that Sinn, CJ and I always talk about on our blogs.
Way back when he took a Boot Camp with Asian Playboy and Prophet.
Then about a year and a half ago, perhaps more, he did a workshop with Brad P.
His name is Shaft, Double D, or Juice depending upon who you talk to.
But one thing is for certain the guy is good.
If you ever get the chance to see the guy work it is amazing. But Shaft sightings seem to rival CJ sightings.
The thing about him is, that he kind of is one part of the definition of Dallas' style of game. Basically my Routine Stacks I sell are based on the never ending dinners and lunches with this guy.
All of my initial Routine Stacks I went over with him before I mailed them out.
It was weird to have two guys like Captain Jack and Shaft in the Same City!
The two are master framers and come at different angles of Game.
Both guys come from a very non-traditional stlye that is all their own.
And interesting thing about Shaft is that he has one of the better Stripper records than anyone I know.
Both he and Sinn compare notes, and both guys work it completely different. As Sinn has always said Strippers are harder to game (and I believe him). But Shaft says it is almost easier for him. And seeing how he works has made me see how he does it.
He uses frames that root to shape the emotions and roles women communicate to him on. I would always call these Comfort Frames, but Shaft takes it a step further and calls them Subpersonalities. He is much better than I at explaining them.
So I asked him to give me a write up...
Here it is! And let me know if you find this sort of thing helpful, and I will try and have other guys who don't post too much featured on my blog!
el.topo.el@gmail.com
Enjoy
ET
Subpersonalities-
Hello! I go by Shaft.
El Topo has asked me to write something on “frames,” since we have had countless interesting discussions on the topic.
Writing is a lot harder than yapping, I’ve discovered.
My first attempt was a blurb on what is a frame, but that was probably too simple for you guys, and no matter how I rearranged it, it seemed kind of lame.
So I’ll write about something else that I think is a really helpful phenomenon that ties in really nicely with frames.
Let’s say you’re in a bar with a big crowd and dozens of hot girls.
You start talking to one, run your best game, and she’s not buying, for whatever reason.
What are you going to do?
Find another girl who will buy your game.
There’s one out there.
But suppose there aren’t really dozens of girls. Suppose for whatever reason, you like this one, or your buddy likes her friend.
Perhaps there’s a side of her that will buy your game.
Perhaps that side is buried for the moment because she has certain patterns of thought and behaviors whenever she hangs out with her work friends, and different patterns when she hangs out with her school friends, and you found her with her work crowd.
She has at least a couple of distinct subpersonalities, and if you can discover and reach the one that is susceptible to your game, your odds automatically skyrocket any time you walk into a room.
The idea has been around a long time. I really started thinking about subpersonalities when I started trying to break down what I do in my version of stripper game, trying to understand why it works and when it is or is not effective.
I realized that, for practical purposes, it was as if I were interacting with two totally different personalities within the same person.
First the stripper, who is basically not seducible.
Second, the real girl, who may or may not exist, who is seducible.
If you can manage the relationship between the two, you can seduce strippers very consistently.
What do I think is really going on psychologically?
I have no idea, and it probably doesn’t matter.
What does matter is that if you assume there are more than one personality in there, you can sometimes “flip” between them, and actually change the way a person responds in the real world.
There are tons of examples in real life. I can certainly think of guys who get pretty bold around women once they discover the community—as long as they’re with community guys. But they revert to shyness when they’re back with their old friends, because that’s who they are around those friends. Sure, it’s the same guy, and we can guess all day about what causes this—whether he’s consciously moderating his behavior or whether he has two “subpersonalities” that manifest.
But the fact is, he will reflexively feel and act differently. And you can use that to get him to behave differently by moving him between different groups of friends. Or by other means.
More examples: The sixth grade misfit who goes to camp and comes out of his shell to moderate popularity, only to return to obscurity in seventh grade. . . Then to move to a different city and become popular in eighth grade. The tough guy at the bar who is henpecked at home. The quiet guy who becomes a belligerent drunk.
To explain why the concept of subpersonalities so neatly dovetails with the idea of frames, I’ll use the analogy of a play. Think of a frame as the stage and set: A simplified model of the part of the world that’s relevant to the play.
When you set a frame, it’s like you’re building the set, placing props, even dressing and positioning the actors. Still, the actor has to have a script and a motivation. The frame is what’s happening. People and personalities are who it’s happening to.
There’s an awesome improv show called “Who’s line is it anyway.” One type of exercise involves setting up a certain inherently unremarkable situation, then giving the actors various identities and place them in that situation. For example, a dinner party. One guy is a Kung-Fu fighter. Another guy only talks in questions, etc. The comedy comes from the unpredictability, and that comes from the fact that the actors are out of context. That’s an extreme version of what is happening when you set up a frame without figuring out who you’re dealing with. She’s out with her brothers and cousins and you are asking her about her wildest sexual position, or asking if she’d like to kiss you. May work, may not—it’s a gamble. But get her on the other side of the room, find out about her wilder side, talk to that side, then ask the same thing—much more likely. (By the way, remember being told at boot camp to move and isolate?)
Captain Jack does this all the time. He doesn’t use the same terms—he calls what he does framing.
But what he does, and what many people don’t get, is that eliciting sexual and adventurous personas is part and parcel of his own handcrafted framing routines. One way of accessing a subpersonality is by giving permission for that subpersonality to come out. CJ does that with his body language and his routines. Another way is to talk to the subpersonality. That’s a whole topic in itself. But CJ’s own rings-on-fingers routines and strawberry fields routines do both.
Everybody is different, and everybody has different aspects that emerge under various circumstances. Some people really suppress their impulsive side, but have a very accessible sensual side, or a submissive side.
That is why if you just run the same routines, it will work eventually when you find the right girl who is ready to buy your game. But you’re playing a numbers game. If you figure out whom you’re dealing with, bring out one of the more complicit subpersonalities, then run the right kind of game, you have dramatically increased your odds of getting the girl you want. Off the top of my head, a few personas that could be helpful for pickup include:
hypersexual, sensual, adventurous, hedonistic, independent, submissive, dominant, rebellious, anonymous.
You can talk to more than one subpersonality at the same time. This is where it gets interesting. For example, “It’s 2 o’clock” may mean “time to sleep” to the “Den Mother” personality, but nothing at all—or “time for the afterparty”—to the “party girl” personality. What result you get depends on the relative strength of each subpersonality at the moment.
What if you say something that has meaning to both personalities, like “I’m going to take you home and fuck you” for example. You will get a response from each subpersonality relative to how strongly that subpersonality is present. Hopefully you’ll have reduced the “Den Mother” persona into the background, and increased the “party girl” persona in the foreground. What if that’s not possible, if she’s getting all kinds of stimuli from her friends that keep “Den mother” in the foreground as you cultivate “party girl?”
She’ll have two reactions:
1) I want to fuck him, and
2) that would make me a slut.
The ultimate mental computation reduces to “I am a bad person”, which conflicts (I hope) with her basic core beliefs. The term for that is “cognitive dissonance” and comes along with an awful psychic feeling akin to being kicked in the gut. Therefore, the state is usually quickly resolved quickly suppressing one of the responding subpersonalities. That’s basically what is going on when you get an anti-slut defense.
However, there are some effective techniques that you can use. You can anchor your tone and pacing to different personalities. For example, one thing I do all the time is to anchor “social girl”—the girl I first met out with her friends—to a normal tone and pacing.
Then, I’ll anchor (for example) submissive girl to a slower pacing and lower tone.
Now, I can talk to each subpersonality just by changing my tonality and pacing. I can say, “You little whore” in a slow, low voice and sensual girl hears it, and social girl does not freak out. I can say,
“Nothing is gonna happen. I have to get up early tomorrow.”
In a normal tone, and social girl is happy, and submissive girl ignores. Try accidentally saying that in a low tone, and guess what? Submissive girl starts to give up and fade into the background. What machinery is at work here? Who knows? Again, all I can say is that by pretending there really are two people in there, you really can observe that behavior.
This is starting to get lengthy, but that’s basically the overview. One more thing: This all happens as you build comfort. The process of discovering and accessing subpersonalities should be very normal and conversational. There are no weird rigid routines, no creepy embedded suggestions or crotch pointing. This is not about convincing or coercion. It is about liberating, about finding thrilling aspect of a girl, and letting her feel free to express it, giving her permission to do what she wants. Somewhere inside, like little seed, every girl has a way of giving herself permission to let go. You need to find that seed, and water it until it grows into a plant. . .
So there is this guy that Sinn, CJ and I always talk about on our blogs.
Way back when he took a Boot Camp with Asian Playboy and Prophet.
Then about a year and a half ago, perhaps more, he did a workshop with Brad P.
His name is Shaft, Double D, or Juice depending upon who you talk to.
But one thing is for certain the guy is good.
If you ever get the chance to see the guy work it is amazing. But Shaft sightings seem to rival CJ sightings.
The thing about him is, that he kind of is one part of the definition of Dallas' style of game. Basically my Routine Stacks I sell are based on the never ending dinners and lunches with this guy.
All of my initial Routine Stacks I went over with him before I mailed them out.
It was weird to have two guys like Captain Jack and Shaft in the Same City!
The two are master framers and come at different angles of Game.
Both guys come from a very non-traditional stlye that is all their own.
And interesting thing about Shaft is that he has one of the better Stripper records than anyone I know.
Both he and Sinn compare notes, and both guys work it completely different. As Sinn has always said Strippers are harder to game (and I believe him). But Shaft says it is almost easier for him. And seeing how he works has made me see how he does it.
He uses frames that root to shape the emotions and roles women communicate to him on. I would always call these Comfort Frames, but Shaft takes it a step further and calls them Subpersonalities. He is much better than I at explaining them.
So I asked him to give me a write up...
Here it is! And let me know if you find this sort of thing helpful, and I will try and have other guys who don't post too much featured on my blog!
el.topo.el@gmail.com
Enjoy
ET
Subpersonalities-
Hello! I go by Shaft.
El Topo has asked me to write something on “frames,” since we have had countless interesting discussions on the topic.
Writing is a lot harder than yapping, I’ve discovered.
My first attempt was a blurb on what is a frame, but that was probably too simple for you guys, and no matter how I rearranged it, it seemed kind of lame.
So I’ll write about something else that I think is a really helpful phenomenon that ties in really nicely with frames.
Let’s say you’re in a bar with a big crowd and dozens of hot girls.
You start talking to one, run your best game, and she’s not buying, for whatever reason.
What are you going to do?
Find another girl who will buy your game.
There’s one out there.
But suppose there aren’t really dozens of girls. Suppose for whatever reason, you like this one, or your buddy likes her friend.
Perhaps there’s a side of her that will buy your game.
Perhaps that side is buried for the moment because she has certain patterns of thought and behaviors whenever she hangs out with her work friends, and different patterns when she hangs out with her school friends, and you found her with her work crowd.
She has at least a couple of distinct subpersonalities, and if you can discover and reach the one that is susceptible to your game, your odds automatically skyrocket any time you walk into a room.
The idea has been around a long time. I really started thinking about subpersonalities when I started trying to break down what I do in my version of stripper game, trying to understand why it works and when it is or is not effective.
I realized that, for practical purposes, it was as if I were interacting with two totally different personalities within the same person.
First the stripper, who is basically not seducible.
Second, the real girl, who may or may not exist, who is seducible.
If you can manage the relationship between the two, you can seduce strippers very consistently.
What do I think is really going on psychologically?
I have no idea, and it probably doesn’t matter.
What does matter is that if you assume there are more than one personality in there, you can sometimes “flip” between them, and actually change the way a person responds in the real world.
There are tons of examples in real life. I can certainly think of guys who get pretty bold around women once they discover the community—as long as they’re with community guys. But they revert to shyness when they’re back with their old friends, because that’s who they are around those friends. Sure, it’s the same guy, and we can guess all day about what causes this—whether he’s consciously moderating his behavior or whether he has two “subpersonalities” that manifest.
But the fact is, he will reflexively feel and act differently. And you can use that to get him to behave differently by moving him between different groups of friends. Or by other means.
More examples: The sixth grade misfit who goes to camp and comes out of his shell to moderate popularity, only to return to obscurity in seventh grade. . . Then to move to a different city and become popular in eighth grade. The tough guy at the bar who is henpecked at home. The quiet guy who becomes a belligerent drunk.
To explain why the concept of subpersonalities so neatly dovetails with the idea of frames, I’ll use the analogy of a play. Think of a frame as the stage and set: A simplified model of the part of the world that’s relevant to the play.
When you set a frame, it’s like you’re building the set, placing props, even dressing and positioning the actors. Still, the actor has to have a script and a motivation. The frame is what’s happening. People and personalities are who it’s happening to.
There’s an awesome improv show called “Who’s line is it anyway.” One type of exercise involves setting up a certain inherently unremarkable situation, then giving the actors various identities and place them in that situation. For example, a dinner party. One guy is a Kung-Fu fighter. Another guy only talks in questions, etc. The comedy comes from the unpredictability, and that comes from the fact that the actors are out of context. That’s an extreme version of what is happening when you set up a frame without figuring out who you’re dealing with. She’s out with her brothers and cousins and you are asking her about her wildest sexual position, or asking if she’d like to kiss you. May work, may not—it’s a gamble. But get her on the other side of the room, find out about her wilder side, talk to that side, then ask the same thing—much more likely. (By the way, remember being told at boot camp to move and isolate?)
Captain Jack does this all the time. He doesn’t use the same terms—he calls what he does framing.
But what he does, and what many people don’t get, is that eliciting sexual and adventurous personas is part and parcel of his own handcrafted framing routines. One way of accessing a subpersonality is by giving permission for that subpersonality to come out. CJ does that with his body language and his routines. Another way is to talk to the subpersonality. That’s a whole topic in itself. But CJ’s own rings-on-fingers routines and strawberry fields routines do both.
Everybody is different, and everybody has different aspects that emerge under various circumstances. Some people really suppress their impulsive side, but have a very accessible sensual side, or a submissive side.
That is why if you just run the same routines, it will work eventually when you find the right girl who is ready to buy your game. But you’re playing a numbers game. If you figure out whom you’re dealing with, bring out one of the more complicit subpersonalities, then run the right kind of game, you have dramatically increased your odds of getting the girl you want. Off the top of my head, a few personas that could be helpful for pickup include:
hypersexual, sensual, adventurous, hedonistic, independent, submissive, dominant, rebellious, anonymous.
You can talk to more than one subpersonality at the same time. This is where it gets interesting. For example, “It’s 2 o’clock” may mean “time to sleep” to the “Den Mother” personality, but nothing at all—or “time for the afterparty”—to the “party girl” personality. What result you get depends on the relative strength of each subpersonality at the moment.
What if you say something that has meaning to both personalities, like “I’m going to take you home and fuck you” for example. You will get a response from each subpersonality relative to how strongly that subpersonality is present. Hopefully you’ll have reduced the “Den Mother” persona into the background, and increased the “party girl” persona in the foreground. What if that’s not possible, if she’s getting all kinds of stimuli from her friends that keep “Den mother” in the foreground as you cultivate “party girl?”
She’ll have two reactions:
1) I want to fuck him, and
2) that would make me a slut.
The ultimate mental computation reduces to “I am a bad person”, which conflicts (I hope) with her basic core beliefs. The term for that is “cognitive dissonance” and comes along with an awful psychic feeling akin to being kicked in the gut. Therefore, the state is usually quickly resolved quickly suppressing one of the responding subpersonalities. That’s basically what is going on when you get an anti-slut defense.
However, there are some effective techniques that you can use. You can anchor your tone and pacing to different personalities. For example, one thing I do all the time is to anchor “social girl”—the girl I first met out with her friends—to a normal tone and pacing.
Then, I’ll anchor (for example) submissive girl to a slower pacing and lower tone.
Now, I can talk to each subpersonality just by changing my tonality and pacing. I can say, “You little whore” in a slow, low voice and sensual girl hears it, and social girl does not freak out. I can say,
“Nothing is gonna happen. I have to get up early tomorrow.”
In a normal tone, and social girl is happy, and submissive girl ignores. Try accidentally saying that in a low tone, and guess what? Submissive girl starts to give up and fade into the background. What machinery is at work here? Who knows? Again, all I can say is that by pretending there really are two people in there, you really can observe that behavior.
This is starting to get lengthy, but that’s basically the overview. One more thing: This all happens as you build comfort. The process of discovering and accessing subpersonalities should be very normal and conversational. There are no weird rigid routines, no creepy embedded suggestions or crotch pointing. This is not about convincing or coercion. It is about liberating, about finding thrilling aspect of a girl, and letting her feel free to express it, giving her permission to do what she wants. Somewhere inside, like little seed, every girl has a way of giving herself permission to let go. You need to find that seed, and water it until it grows into a plant. . .
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